Friends 111 宾太太 The One With Mrs Bing
Chandler的妈妈是个情色小说家，从小就令他十分困扰。五人看Chan妈的访谈节目，Chandler才得知她要来纽约。Chan妈跟六人和Paolo一起吃晚饭。
Paolo从罗马飞回来，继续跟Rachel如胶似漆，Ross十分嫉妒。
Ross看着Rachel和Paolo的亲密举动非常难受，狂喝龙舌兰。
喝醉后在卫生间遇到Chan妈，Chan妈开解他，二人拥吻，被Joey撞见。Ross不想告诉Chandler，但Joey坚持认为他的行为是破坏朋友守则的，Ross只得跟Chandler坦白。Chandler非常生气，原本不肯原谅Ross，但在Ross的提示下跟Chan妈坦诚自己的困扰，母子和解，也原谅了Ross。
Rachel在Chan妈的鼓励下开始写情色小说，但功底不够，拼写错误也很多。
莫妮卡和菲比在书报亭偶遇帅哥，莫妮卡的口哨声使该男子发生车祸并进入昏迷状态；两人均到医院悉心照料他，但相互竞争，都想把他占为己有。几天后帅哥苏醒，对二人没有表示太多感激，二人愤然离去。
本集精彩台词：
Monica: Why did I 'woo-woo'? I mean, what was I hoping would happen? That...that he'd turn round and say, 'Ooo, I love that sound, I must have you now'?
Phoebe: I just wish there was something we could do. Hello. Hello, Coma Guy. GET UP YOU GIRL SCOUT! UP! UP! UP!
Monica: Phoebe, what are you doing?
Phoebe: Maybe nobody's tried this.
Ross: When did Rigatoni get back from Rome?
Monica: Last night.
Ross: Really. So then his plane didn't explode in a big ball of fire? Just a dream I had, but phew.
Jay Leno: You know--don't take this wrong--I... I just don't see you as a mom, somehow. I don't mean that... I don't mean that bad...
Mrs. Bing: Oh no, I am a fabulous mom! I bought my son his first condom.
Chandler: And then he burst into flames.
Rachel: Mrs. Bing, I have to tell you: I've read everything you've ever written. No, I mean it! I mean, when I read Euphoria at Midnight all I wanted to do was become a writer.
Mrs. Bing: Oh please, honey, listen, if I can do it, anybody can. You just start with half a dozen European cities, throw in thirty euphemisms for male genitalia, and bam! You have got yourself a book.
Chandler: My mother, ladies and gentlemen.
Mrs. Bing: Oh, Ross, listen to me. I have sold a hundred million copies of my books, and you know why?
Ross: The girl on the cover with her nipples showing?
Monica: What are you guys doing here?
Joey: Uh... he's not even wearing a jockstrap!
Monica: What did I ask?
Ross: I was really upset about Rachel and Paolo and I think I had too much tequila, and Nora... um, Mrs. Mom... your Bing... was just being nice, ya know, and... but nothing happened, nothing. Ask Joey. Joey, uh, came in...
Chandler: You knew about this?
Joey: Uh... ya know, knowledge is a tricky thing.
Monica: A Woman Undone by Rachel Karen Green.
Rachel: Yeah, thought I'd give it a shot. I'm still on the first chapter. Now, do you think his 'love stick' can be 'liberated from its denim prison'?
Monica: Yeah, I'd say so. And there's no 'j' in 'engorged'.
Phoebe (singing): You don't have to be awake to be my man. As long as you have brainwaves I'll be there to hold your hand. Though we just met the other day, there's something I have got to say... [speaking] Okay, thank you very much, I'm gonna take a short break.
Chandler: What was that?
Ross: Oh, uh, Phoebe just started a...
Chandler: Yeah, I believe I was talking to Joey. All right there, Mother-Kisser?
Chandler: You kissed my best Ross! Or something to that effect.
Joey: He did it! He told her off! And not just about the kiss; about everything.
Ross: You're kidding.
Joey: No, no. He said 'When are you gonna grow up and start being a mom?'
Ross: Wow!
Joey: Wait, wait! Then she came back with 'The question is, when are you gonna grow up and realize I have a bomb?'
Ross: OKay, wait a minute. Are you sure she didn't say, 'When are you gonna grow up and realize I am your mom?'
Joey: That makes more sense.
Rachel: Now this is just the first chapter, and I want your absolute honest opinion, okay? Oh, oh, and on page two he's not 'reaching for her heaving beasts'.
Monica: What's a 'niffle'?
Joey: You can usually find them on the 'heaving beasts'.
Rachel: All right, all right, all right. So I'm not a great typist
Ross: Wait! Did you get to the part about his 'huge throbbing pens'? Tell ya, you don't wanna be around when he starts writing with those!
